Manipulation?  Me?

Guess you all have figured out I took a long sabbatical from writing…just too much going on.  But I’m back!  For some reason, God still wants me to write.  I’m trying to be obedient but still struggle with feeling like He’s called the wrong gal.  Anyway, here goes….

Manipulation?  Me?

As I sit here, staring at the blank page, a topic pops into my head.

Sometimes when I write, God has already burdened my heart. And I know exactly what He wants me to discuss.

Then, there are numerous other occasions when I don’t have a clue what to write about.

But today, He made the topic crystal clear.  How?  Usually, He has me write about an area where I’ve struggled – or am still struggling.  And more times than not, God has spoken to me and/or convicted me regarding something in my own life…and how I need to change or surrender it to Him. Today’s article certainly fits the bill as it’s an area in which God is still chiseling away at my character, will and heart.

If someone were to ask you, “Are you a manipulative person?”  you would probably answer immediately “no” and you might even be somewhat offended.  I typically think of someone that’s manipulative as being controlling, deceptive or underhanded.  Certainly, just the word has a negative connotation.

But as Christian women, I think we can cross over into being manipulative without even realizing it.

For me, I do this with the people that I’m closest to, especially my family.

I’d probably do it with my husband more if he wasn’t such a strong personality and leader.  Seriously.  I have friends that do with their spouses.  They are well-meaning and not what I would term “manipulative”.  They just want the best for their loved ones.

Let’s evaluate this topic a little.

If I think my husband, adult child (or really anyone I’m close to) is going to make a mistake or something I totally disagree with, what’s my first reaction?  Is it to pray about it?  Do I take the issue to God and ask for His wisdom — or do I immediately try to twist the other person’s arm or try to sway them into doing what I think is correct?

More times than I’d like to admit, taking it to the Father is not my first “go to”.

I remember doing a Bible study several years ago in BSF (Bible Study Fellowship).  Typically, in this organization you study one book of the Bible during the course of a year.  This particular year was the book of Genesis.  It’s one of my favorite studies; I’ve actually been through it twice!  God taught me different things each time (once was when my son was only 3 years old, and the next time he was grown)!

But one lesson that stood out…in fact, it hit me “between the eyes” as it was so stark.  And hit such a nerve with me…you know what I mean.

Has the preacher ever been preaching, and you think he has a window into your home? You know… it’s so “spot on”. You leave wondering how he could possibly know what’s going on in your life?  I love when the Holy Spirit does that, and you realize only HE could know.

That was the case with this lesson.

The subject matter was Abram and Sarai.  When God didn’t give them a son immediately after His promises to Abram, what did Sarai do?  When she couldn’t get pregnant, what did she do?  Did she immediately turn to the Father and start praying?  Did she fast?  Did she ask close family and friends for wisdom and to pray on her behalf and Abram’s? Did she go to Abram and say, “Let’s pray together?”  If she did any of these things, we have no record of that in the Bible. Was she like Hannah who cried out to the Lord for a child?  No!

Did she WAIT on God and trust that He would indeed give she and Abram a son?  Did she trust that God did indeed have a plan?  After all, God had promised that Abram’s descendants would be as numerous as the stars.  Did she totally dismiss what God told Abram?  Did she think God needed help?

Whatever she thought, we know what happened.

Sarai devised her own plan.

Read that again.

Sarai took matters into her own hands.

I won’t ask for a show of hands out there.  But how many of you WOMEN have done something similar?  Not once, but numerous times.

We women are not the only ones.  Men can be guilty of this as well.

Sorry to pick on the women, but you have to admit it’s true.

We are planners. We are organizers.  We are problem solvers.  We LOVE deeply.  We don’t want to see loved ones, especially our kids or grandkids, make mistakes.  We will do anything to keep him/her from going down the wrong path.

Maybe I’m overstating it.

All I know is, I could be Sarai.  I can try to control, manipulate and formulate my OWN plan. 

But in the last few years, God has dealt with me on this issue.  He has convicted me — and through His Holy Spirit, I’ve realized I need to bring issues to HIM FIRST and FOREMOST…and more importantly, trust that HE has a plan. And that His plan is THE BEST!  Better than mine or anyone else’s.

Think of the havoc that Sarai caused.  Think of how many people were impacted negatively because she didn’t wait on God’s timing.

Even as I typed that last sentence, God got my attention.

I’m praying about something now in a loved one’s life that requires me to WAIT on God. I’m not liking it.  I’m wanting God to act NOW.  I’m wanting to SEE the end result.  And frankly, it’s difficult being patient.  I don’t understand why God isn’t moving immediately.  I struggle with wanting to put my plan into action.

How about YOU?

Are you trying to get ahead of God?  Do you have a tough time waiting on His plan to emerge?

Have you even paused from your plans and scheming to ask Him what your course of action should be?

Has God told you to wait, but you want to take action?

Again, today I heard His voice saying, “Trust me, Laura”.  I was comforted.  I was encouraged.  I was thankful for His reminder.  But I asked Him to give me the strength to wait and not intervene.  I’ve learned my tendency is to still want to take action.

Friend, do you struggle to sit back and wait? Like me…You want to DO something.  Correct?

Praying seems too passive.  Yes, I just typed that sentence.  I don’t mean that disrespectfully.  Believe me, I’m beyond grateful that the God of the Universe that controls the stars, planets, galaxies and all the countries of the world would communicate with me — and even want a relationship.  But be honest.  Sometimes, we don’t want to pray.  It’s too difficult, right?

But, oh, friend.  God has taught me that it’s worth crying out to Him.  It’s worth waiting.  Because HIS PLAN far exceeds what we can think or imagine (Ephesians 3:20).  Our measly, simple contrived plan isn’t even in the same ballpark as the Lord’s.

So, what will you choose?